Overcome perfectionism, aim for excellence instead of perfection
Striving for great results or excellence isn’t a bad thing, quite the opposite. Wanting to be great at what you do and seeing results in your work or studies gives a lot of joy. It is motivating and increases the feeling of accomplishment. The best way to do so is to overcome perfectionism and aim for excellence instead of perfection.
There is a huge danger in not understanding the difference between striving for excellence and striving for perfection. When you become aware of the difference between the two, you can start to pay attention to your own action and your thoughts creating your action.
Why perfectionism isn´t something to strive for
Perfectionism isn´t about high achieving. On the contrary. Many times, perfectionist thinking has you achieve less and stress more. Brené Brown describes perfectionism in the following way:
“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfection is not about healthy achievement and growth.”
Brené Brown
She explains how perfectionism is used by many people as a shield to protect against the pain of blame, judgment, or shame.
The difference between striving for perfectionism and excellence
There is a huge difference between on the one hand striving for excellence, and on the other hand in demanding perfection.
Perfectionism is not about you being perfect or you delivering perfect results. Nor is perfectionism about you having a perfect body or a perfectly tidy home.
Perfectionism is about the way you think, not about the outcome itself. Thus, perfectionism can hinder you from enjoying what you set out to do, and instead create unnecessary stress in life.
When having perfectionistic tendencies, you are likely to have unrealistic perceptions of how you should perform, or how to live life. Perfectionism is about setting too high standards that may paralyze you to procrastinate. It is also about being critical of others as well as of yourself, many times to the extent that it can cause some level of anxiety for you.
To sum it up perfectionism will have you focus only on the result you are aiming for, and on the failure, you are fearing. Instead of enjoying the journey, you are on.
If perfectionism is about striving for perfect mastery, pursuing excellence can be described as aiming to improve. When you are pursuing excellence, you are accepting failure by understanding it is inevitable for growth. When you strive for excellence, you can enjoy the journey you are on, while learning and evolving.
Striving for excellence instead of perfection will also make you more confident when faced with new challenges.
Overcome perfectionism, from perfection towards pursuing excellence
Perfectionism, or tendencies towards it, is something many of us struggle with. Even if we aren´t willing to name or label it as perfection.
Many of us might even kid ourselves to believe perfection is worth striving for. However, when you understand not only the difference between the two but also the outcome, the choice is easy. By understanding perfectionism, you can and most likely will aim for excellence instead of perfection.
How to spot perfectionism in everyday life
If you find you have tendencies towards perfection the first step is to spot the situations when it occurs, then learn what you can do about them. Becoming aware of something is always the first step towards change. By paying attention to how you think and what the outcome of those thought patterns are, you are well on your way!
When you understand how you think and how that affects your behavior you can always evolve. Therefore, a list of typical thought patterns is a perfect way to start when you want to understand how perfectionistic thoughts show up in everyday life. This is a list of nine typical thought errors of a perfectionist.
- Unrealistic standards.
- Ambitious and driven but also highly critical.
- All-or-nothing thinking.
- You tend to be pushed by fear.
- Focusing strictly on the goal.
- You tend to beat yourself up if you don´t meet your own expectations.
- Procrastination is something typical for you.
- You tend to be defensive when given constructive criticism.
- Low self-esteem.
It will take some time to change your thoughts so try to be patient. When you have spotted your thoughts around something then you will be able to make a change in your behavior. It will take some time, but the journey is interesting! And hey, if you work out at the gym you aren´t expecting results right away either. Growing as a human being is a process and a journey you can begin any day.
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