Travelling solo
Stretching the mind
By Catharina Kallio
Preparing for a trip and travelling solo as an HSP-HSS is going to stretch your mind. And it will be both fun and thrilling at the same time. I must tell you, I was seriously nervous for my first solo trip. It was going to be a huge step out of my comfort zone. Having all my doubts and still challenging myself to move forward with my plan, was truly worth the while! In the end it has given me more than money can ever buy.
My first solo trip became reality a few years ago as I was flying from northern Europe to Asia. Before that I had never even booked a plane ticket by myself. You can only imagine how much I needed to learn and understand to even be able to take the trip. Looking back, it´s somewhat funny.
Travelling solo as a high sensation seeking highly sensitive person is an experience like no other and I learned a great deal about myself and about the world.,
Travelling solo as HSP-HSS is stretching your mind
In this article you will get some of the best practices concerning planning a trip as well as what to focus on when packing, flying and staying at the destination. Since my first trip I have travelled many times, all of them solo. Hopefully this article will inspire you to do the same if this has been something you have put off for the reason of being afraid of it.
It has been surprising to find that travelling solo will altogether steer me on another path of soul-searching. It has brought up new ways of thinking that can be used in day-to-day life. I will let you know about them further on.
Why I decided to travel solo
My decision to travel solo was simply an urge I had. I needed to challenge myself and I was looking for something I could not find at home.
Like HSPs in common I have always felt a desire to understand the world, understand what life is about and understand myself in it. The opportunity to travel with someone never arose, so I had to make my own opportunity to travel.
Travelling solo as a highly sensitive person; Preparing for the trip
Travelling solo for the first time in combination with travelling to the other side of the globe had me really take my preparations seriously. I had no idea how I would feel, how anything would work out or what I could expect. So, with that in mind, I focused on the preparations.
What I practically did is I asked friends who have travelled and looked for advice on the internet. I signed up on travelling related facebook groups, read some books and gathered information. (As HSPs tend to do, because we want to know and understand it all)
My aim was to try and compare what I had learned during my information retrieval, to what I knew about HSP- HSS and about myself.
To make it easier for you I have put together some of my guidelines when preparing for a trip.
What to consider before and during your travel:
- My suggestion would be; start packing maybe even a few weeks beforehand, this will avoid you from feeling all the stress of travelling, packing and work, all at once.
- In the beginning it might be a good idea to plan most of the vacation before taking off. I had my flights and accommodations booked beforehand. When getting used to travelling and as you learn what your personal preferences are, why not leave some of the trip unplanned. Nowadays, I book my flight and the first accommodation. Nothing more. I enjoy the freedom to do what I want, when I want. I also enjoy the excitement of not knowing what to do next. (This is the HSS talking. One foot on the gas, the other on the brake. Have you heard that before?)
- We never know what will happen when travelling. That is why I suggest you always bring food with you. It can for instance be snacks of some sort, something that is allowed on the plane. I never want to be in the situation where I´m stuck somewhere without food. (Not a good thing for an HSP)
- Airports and planes are noisy. I suggest you try noise cancelling ear buds. I would not give mine away for any amount of money (Too much noise can have a negative impact on an HSP, it gets us stressed. That is something we don´t want to happen).
- A tip for a night flight is to bring a large thin scarf to keep over the face when sleeping. This gives you some privacy.
- I have many times been asked how it feels to go out eating alone. At first it feels strange, but one gets used to it. What I always do is, I bring along a small notebook in which to write my thought. That way there will be less feeling of awkwardness or loneliness. In the notebook you could write about how you feel or maybe describe the view. I carry my notebook with me everywhere I go.
- Another notebook is kept in my room. It’s a larger one and I use it for journaling, planning my trip and keeping my mind calm.
How I prefer to travel, by taking my HSP-HSS trait into consideration
The strangest routine before the trip
I must say love some of the special routines I have built for myself before I leave on a trip. When I carry out the routine, I know I´m heading out for adventure, finding myself and the world again. It is a bit hard to explain how deeply satisfied, grateful and inspired I feel when the time for my take off is getting closer. When I decide “today is the day” for my routine. (If you are an HSP I think you will get me.)
It is kind of silly, but here we go, this is the routine. I go and buy separately packed porridge (this way I will not have to be hungry in my room if I don´t feel like going out eating. This is an HSP thing again) and I choose to take with me one small bottle of cognac. Writing this routine down it makes me feel silly, but in the moment, it makes me want to jump up and down like a small child. I´m so excited.
Suggestions you might want to ponder
It goes without saying that we all have our personal preferences and interests regarding what we want to see and experience when travelling. My way of travelling is to combine city life with beach life and then try to combine it with experiencing local life if possible. By not having everything set, you will have the freedom to choose according to what you will need in the specific moment. In case you feel you need a few more days by yourself you can choose that. On the other hand, you might for instance like some city more than you thought you would. Having no plans will give you the freedom to choose.
If you are an HSP-HSS you will need experiences during your travel. Personally, I would go crazy if I would have to stay one week by the pool. Then again, I´m not a fan of the most touristic places, they feel shallow in some way. (HSPs you know, there needs to be a deeper meaning for everything). But with all the interesting things going on, remember to take some time and give your brain the space it needs.
Why spending some extra money on accommodation might be a good idea
As I´m travelling solo as an HSP-HSS I choose to never be too far away from people. Then again staying in too crowded places for a long period of time will feel stressful. If you take a Finn and place her anywhere in Asia, it will feel like a crowded place. That is why some precautions had to be made. Which brings us to the next topic, accommodation.
As an HSP it is crucial to stay at a place where it is possible to be by yourself. I´m very picky regarding where I stay. I never know at what point I will get too overwhelmed and just need to stay and relax most of the day. I would feel extremely uneasy if I didn’t have my space to withdraw to. Because I travel solo, I focus a lot on the accommodation. I need to stay at a place where I feel secure and enjoy the surrounding. That is why I don’t mind paying some extra for it.
“Finding the balance between the two traits, HSP and HSS is an interesting journey in itself. Travelling solo will even expand it to the next level.”
Lessons learned; travelling solo as HSP-HSS
The depth of self-reflection advances to another level
Travelling solo as an HSP-HSS has made me self-reflect a lot. Partly because it is typical for us HSPs to do that but also because of the different situations and unfamiliar surrounding I have been in.
Many HSPs seem to feel awkward, strange or misplaced in life, they feel they don´t fit in. The reason for this would be an interesting discussion but not a topic that will be tackled at this point. Instead I can say I do relate to this, because I have felt the same way. Luckily, I have come to realize it was all in my head. The feeling of not fitting in still comes up now and then but there is no point in placing any focus nor energy on it anymore. If we are different, so what. Travelling solo has confirmed I´m a part of this world as much as everybody else.
If we want to live the best possible way with the high sensitivity trait combined with the high sensation seeking trait we need to focus on balance. On one hand there is the need for experiences and on the other hand the need for security and isolation or lone time. I have learned to listen to myself far more than before. I´m not hiding away, nor am I pushing myself too much. Both are ok. I have learned to choose what I need instead of following someone else.
Travelling can be all about experiencing the world and the people in it. But it can also be about challenging oneself. Stepping outside of the comfort zone in different situations makes us grow and see ourselves and the world through another set of lenses. It is about stretching the comfort zone until there is a new dimension of thinking and acting. No more going back to “playing it too safe”.
Coping with emotions
Travelling solo as an HSP-HSS you will most likely learn to listen to yourself even on a deeper level than before. At some point fear will most likely kick in. (This is by the way an occasion when I use my journal.) In these situations, I sometimes push through the fear and other times I understand I´m just overwhelmed and need my rest.
I love my emotions, but this has not always been the case, I assure you. There has been struggles. The realization that our emotions show us what we are thinking has for me been eye opening. We believe we know what we are thinking, but if we did, we would not walk around upset, angry or fearful without knowing why.
Recognizing emotions without being afraid of them will offer peace of mind. Having a fearful emotion but deciding to walk towards it and face it will make us grow. We become stronger and learn to trust ourselves even more. You can read more about the topic here.
People come and go
As social animals we feel the need to fit in and behave in the way our surrounding is expecting us to. Sometimes we (HSPs) want to please other people too much. We are good at reading situations and tend to want to understand other people´s behavior even too much. Many of us also take too much responsibility for other people´s feelings. We give and give without receiving. Sometimes we cling on to other people, instead of letting go, because we haven’t figured out where we stand with them.
During my travels I have clearly noticed and deeply internalized the fact that people come and go in our lives. That is the charm of travelling. And the good news is, this can be used in everyday life as well.
When travelling solo we are going to meet a various number of other travelers and people. Some of them we talk to briefly, others we might even travel with for a few days. Then there are people who become our friends.
The secret is: changing this attitude of wanting to understand everyone and trying to be “too much” to some people. Instead, have no expectation. Just like when travelling. Whatever comes will come and that is something to be grateful for.
I have met the most amazing people travelling and for some reason I feel I have met the right people at the right time in my life.
“A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to it´s former dimensions.”
– Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
Hopefully this article made you rethink some of your fears or attitudes towards travelling solo as an HSP-HSS. It will stretch your mind.
In case you don´t recognize the trait in yourself I still wish I was able change your mind on some level. Step out of your comfort zone, challenge yourselves. Try taking a trip to the closest town if travelling further is not an option. Do something.
- Want to know how to make your HSP trait an advantage for you? I´ll help you with that! You can read more here.
If you feel there is something you would like to discuss further, feel free to contact me.
